-I know something is up...But I can't figure it out. I wish you were completely straight with me, all of the time. I need to listen... and I need to talk...Communicate....How are you supposed to know what's going on. How do you trust me if I don't open up to you more? I'm sorry for holding back.
I dont know what I'm feeling....Or is that what I always say because what I'm feeling is something that I don't want to feel-or is it somethng that I shouldn't feel...Something bothers me, but I don't want to look like I'm complaining, or I just want to be 'whatever' about it. So my feelings make me cry--maybe I don't want to accept the real fact that I'm crying...so I say I don't know why? Mabes I just don't want other people to know? but why is that? so I try to make it something else?
*Sacrificial Living-- What does that mean in my own life?
--Offering God my BIGGEST and my Best... So what is that?
+God will you make us a people that LOVE you!+
--------giving up myself-----
Today is Crissy's (my sister) Birthday. 32. I wonder when she was my age what she thought she was going to be at 32. Or when she was 17...what did she think life at 32 was going to be cuz at 19 she was alright gone. **Be with her* I worry about her so much. It breaks my heart. I use to want to be just like her....hopefully I don't turn into her. I think about her everyday and just wonder> why? what? how? WHEN? where?>>I've always chewed on that...never figured it out.
Tomorrow's a New day
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