Letters...

So I have been thinking about my Dad alot lately...Prob's because he has come up in alot of conversations that I have had with numerous people. But I have these 3 letter's that he sent me while I did Work Crew like 4 summers ago. And I read them usually when I miss him or when I'm upset. And well I was thinking about him alot tonight, so I got out the envelope addressed to "My most precious gift, Ashley." Ah. He's so good to me, and I miss him so much. Just being with him everyday for a month in a place that we both love so much was one of the best experiences. I miss having meaning conversations with him. Conversations that are truly meaningful have been happening to me for the past few days....and it's been great. I feel that sometimes being here that is hard for me to do. Many reason's attain to that....but probs the big reason is that I just don't feel like talking about things.
But anyways, I have just been feeling alot of different emotions with my Dad lately. I just want to spend a whole day...Just him and I together, here in Chicago. It would be great just to go out to dinner with him and a few of my friends here. He's so fun and he would love some of the people that I have been spending alot of time with lately. ah. I Just miss him alot. lol. More then Usual.

God's Timing

I love how crazy relationships are. Not like relationships where you are dating and stuff like that. But relationships you have with everyone on a day to day basis. In my own life God has been so great to me with the relationships that I encounter at TIMES. I emphasize on times because God couldn't be better with his timing with the types of relationships that he has me encounter. I have seen so many people come and go throughout my lifetime; some have been very long relationships, and other's have lasted lets say 4 months to a year. But everyone of those people brought something to me at a specific time in my life when I couln't have needed it more.
And with my personality type it's so great. I am very intentional about my relationships and really care about people, but I don't really like talking about myself. And God always seems to put these people in my life that take care of me and ask me the questions that I need to be asked. Because well I know that I'm not just going to talk about it. I feel so blessed for this need that I have that God has taken care of so much. Like for instance, I have this friend that I tell just about everything to here at school...well now she isn't here this semester. She was like a mom away from home. A best friend. A relationship that I didn't and well am still coping with the fact that shes not around. But this semester God has already given me a new friend (not new, but we are closer then before) who is so easy to talk to....and well she takes care of me here at school...Mom away from home. It's so great. I just feel so blessed right now. And extremely for the fact that God has always supplied me in that area in a way that cannot be described in words.

A Little more from now....not so soon. haha

So I like how I wanted to post more about Jamaica like 2 weeks ago. ha. Well since school started I don't think I have ever been so busy...EVER. I don't understand why. lol.
But I might as well let you know about my feelings on Jamaica, and being here in Chicago.
So while being in Jamaica, I met with some Young People in the church that we attend. And well long story short, they want a ministry like YoungLife b/c they say it's what they need. And well my dad and I want to do it. So ministry in Jamaica....who would have thought.
It's funny to me that this subject comes up--b/c since I was a freshman in HS I was so confused as to why God would have me grow up in a place, whose culture is so different. Why would he do that to me. lol. Especially when I was really young and starting school here in Illinois. TOTAL CULTURE SHOCK! but it all makes sense now. Being able to speak their language and understand why they do the things that they do is something that I am so happy to be apart of. Especially if my future is in this. But only God knows that one. I'm just curiose to see how it goes about.
So being back here...it's interesting. My heart is somewhere else and I'm here. But I love the people that are around me here so that helps alot.
My schedule for this Quad though is out of control...and I want it to be over already. Our aread director says that my weakness as a YoungLife leader is taking on too many tasks. Yeap..it is. Or maybe I'm able to handle it and I just do not know it yet because I haven't taken on this much. So we will just see. It's not going to kill me, and I'm still having a great time. And it will be over before I know it, and then it will be SPRING BREAK!! YAY Florida! back to the warm weather where I belong. ha.
So now that Leann and Lauren are gone, and soccer is over, I have been hanging out with Meghan H alot. And well it's great. She is like my new mom at school...especially since Leann is gone. But it's great. I spent all day yesterday with her and her family just hanging out at her house and going to church and stuff. It's a really good thing for me. She's really good at talking through things and asking me questions that I need to be asked..otherwise we all know I won't talk about anything. So this relationship is a good thing to have. And I'm going to Florida with her so thats good. It's funny to watch through time who you hang out with and who you talk to.
Well I'm super busy this week....So I'm gonna get to it.

Irie Mon

Well I am back in my home country, which well doesn't feel much like home. Ha. Maybe that is because I didn't get to actually go home, but Jamaica just feels so much like home--well to a certain point. I love it down there so much. And when people hear that I went to Jamaica for my whole Christmas break, it isn't what they think. I didn't stay in a restort--ha or a hotel for that matter, I didn't have a TV, no phone, no white people(ha-their aren't any when you leave the resorts)....and well what I'm trying to say is that when I go to Jamaica, I go to JAMAICA. Anyways I loved being back....It has been a while since I have been 'home.'

So much happened while I was there that I know it's impossible to cover here. You just had to be there. I got to be with people that I love so much that I haven't seen in so long. And I met some new people while being down there that I absolutely fell in love with.

Meet Omar-He's 6, and become well I guess you could call him my little brother. We hung out everyday. He taught me alot about life, and what it means to have absolutely nothing. Where we live down in Jamaica it's a community called Cataboo. The people that live there are pretty poor. Living there is very different then being here in America. These people wake up every morning and the first thing they think about is how are they going to eat that day. And everyday they wake up and live to eat. Whether that is selling things to be able to buy food, or if it is going out on the river everyday catching fish to eat, or growing food in their own yards. This time people being poor and trying to eat everyday really hit me hard; spending everyday with a 6 year old who is not eating because he has no money to eat. His family barely eats. I fell in love with this kid. Trying to feed him everday day-and trying to give him healthy food. On Monday we found out that Omar was really sick..and on a normal basis he doesn't like solid foods-he likes them softened up whether he does that with water of just takes in liquids. ANyways he got really sick and Ms.Pat (my mom) took care of him, helping him break his fever and such things. She noticed his glands were really swollen, and that his tonsils do not look good. So his tonsils cause him to not like eating alot of food that is good for him. We came to a conclusion that his sickness-which happens often is from malnutrition and well just the basic problem of having the lack of food. Omar is really starving. This breaks my heart to even think about. He's the greatest kid I have met, and right now not being there with him worry's me really bad, and I don't really worry about things. Anyways the first day we were there I was on the dock throwing line into the river to catch fish, and this kid going 90 miles an hour runs over from across the river and takes my line saying "Me want catch fish." So there I stood behind the skinniest kid I have ever seen, and i didn't even know his name watching him catch fish. He leaves. Next morning my mom wakes up at 5:30am, and well Omar comes running over as soon as she wakes up to eat Breakfast with her. I wake up at 8am which is early lol, well for me. I walk out and this bossy kid comes out looks at me and says "ya sleep too long, come lets play." So waking up to this kid in the front room with my mom everymorning is something that I am going to miss. Everyday with Omar consisted of things that I will never forget and that will remain in my heart forever. He would lay in the hammock with me and have me read him stories from the Bible, and then when I would read the Jesus Creed he made me read it to him outloud. Then we would take a short nap. I got to teach him what Love was, something that he doesn't know. I hugged him one day, and then after that he would ask for a hug everday. Seeing this kid grow for the month that I was there was amazing. I taught him to pray and give thanks for food and such things so when we would eat he would pray and give thanks for the food that was provided for him and it was so awesome to here. I pray that God continues to provide him food everyday to live on.

One night my dad and I were talking to Omar's father, Ranklin. He was telling us how much Omar loves us and how the day we took him to the beach was the best day he ever had, and he hasn't stopped talking about it since then. He also informed us that Omar loves to fish, which he know, but what we didn't know is that the fish that Omar catches-he provides food for his family with that. Whether it's selling it for a little money or just eating it themselves. I know I'm just rambling but this is where my heart is right now, and well I already miss him a ton.

Well that is enough for this post--That was just about Omar. ha. But I will talk about other things later...prolly later tonight.

A little more from now. anyways Irie= (alright, everythings cool, Have a great night...it mean's everything good. ha)