Patience...

God really knows how to test my patience....and it doesn't bother me at all. So I found out today that I will be working at Camp. They called me. After my breakdown a couple of days ago when they told me they weren't gonna have me. That's testing for sure. But God is so great. And I knew that this would work out. It had to. Because staying here would have been old...and well Lori would have been Gone and that would have sucked a ton!

I have wanted to post about several things the past few nights...but I have been out so late that once I get home I just crash...and well now those things are not coming to me. Every time I talk to Lori there is something that I could potentially talk about on here. I think out of anything this summer that girl has helped me grow in my relationship in Christ. I wish I would have had her around during the school year. Or someone like her.
She has helped me to have confidence in what I can do...and what I will do this next year...and well for the rest of my life. It is going to be so hard...but finding people like Lori up at school has to be the first step.
I am kind of excited to hang out with her sister though up there. I'm prolly gonna see if like maybe on the weekends if she wants to hang out....besides just the nights that she is prolly gonna stay on our couch...which I am really looking forward to.

-It's a Genuine relationship. Everything is so real about it. Honesty.

I thought tonight I was gonna have to say 'See ya later.' But I don't. And this makes me really happy.

I got a card and Heavyweights in the Mail today from Leann for my Birthday. The car was hilarious. The front was like different ways in a church that people worship. And then inside it was a phrase that had to do with all of them requiring deodorant. and well it made me laugh hard.

I don't have much to say

Which way to go...

Scot Heinhold just stopped by here at the Blend...so we talked a lil' bit. He is so awesome. And I really love talking to him.
We talked about Castaway...and Summer Staff...And God putting so many things (it seems) right in front of us..and which way we are supposed to go. He really made me feel good about it. And he loves that I will be working there cuz he knows that's what I love to do. So I'm gonna start packing up for school...and then packing up for camp this week. And well if nobody drops then unpacking a bag is not hard...And I'm okay with that. Then God has something better....but I just don't see it. lol.

This next school year is going to be really challenging in a lot of ways. But I am ready for it and I have faith in myself. I know what I want to do...and now I just have to accomplish that. Now it's finding people at school to help me with it. And I can do that. Leaving people is the hardest part...but it is something that I know I have to do. And I know God will provide. He won't leave me empty in that compartment I know...because when that happens....that is when it all starts back up again.

What a beautiful day. A day filled with opportunities to Love.

The things around us...

It's been a while.
Tonight driving home it was so beautiful out. I mean it still is...sitting here, looking out the window. The sky is so clear, and everything is so quiet and peaceful. It's so great. And I have to wake up in less than 4 hours..ha. to pick my mom up at the train station. I really hope she had a great time with her Dad in Tennessee...I'm just bummed I didn't get to go..but that's okay.
And I'm really excited to watch the sunrise while driving to Bloomington... I love early mornings...Even thought I'm dead tired..but God is so great. Uh. Cup of coffee and the morning :-).

-I have been really blessed...and it doesn't make sense. But I am grateful for that.

Open Our Eyes

"I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the HOPE to which he has called you, the RICHES of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great POWER for us who believe. That POWER is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power, and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way."--Ephesians 1:18-23(NIV)

+our body is the Fullness of Christ...let us pray that we may recieve RIGHT NOW...not when we are in heaven....that we may recieve Power, Riches, and Hope.
Pastor Cal hit this nail right on the head. I Love how the Holy Spirit works through him...and he doesn't keep it in like alot of Pastors that I have heard speak before do. Watering down the Gospel is something that he will not allow himself to do to keep people coming to his church....and well if you ask me..he isn't really driving people away at all. The Holy Spirit keeps speaking through him....And that same Holy Spirit keeps people coming back to Northwoods...and bringing new people.

-He talked about how there is a natural dimension...and then there is a spiritual dimension...and a lot of times we see things in it's natural state of being. For example.--today my parents were arguing about the car thing...(so annoying...they just need to buy one already cuz our car uses too much gas.) well when I came home they sat me down and said...we are going to be a car...but when you graduate we are giving it to you--Fair enough...today we go look for cars and my mom is like why are u asking her if she likes them....well I get it in 2 years...so I guess I should like it. So my dad reminds her what we are doing. So then she is like "and in 2 years we are carless."--That's the natural dimension...My mom see's this the way that it would be happening....My father responds with the fact that he is not worried about in 2 years...it's about the now and in 2 years he knows God will provide them with something...what they will need at that time---Faith...simple as that--That is the Spiritual Dimension.

These 2 views are so true...and can go along with everything that we do daily...Do we want to use the Hope, Riches, and Power Christ allows us to have NOW....or do you want to wait...and never use them? sounds like a no brainer huh....But having that Faith isn't always easy...especially if you can't control/see/know what is going to happen in the future.

*How do we develop Spiritual Eyesight* (Cal challenging the church)
1.)Pray for greater Spiritual perception.--Wisdom and Revelation in Everything.
2.)Saturate your mind w/Gods word.
3.) Hang out w/ those that have the kind of Eyesight that you want.---By being with those people...my eyesight gets transformed.
4.) Don't settle for Boring!
-Ask God to kick you out of your Comfort Zone.--Ask him to take you to new levels in your walk.--Put yourself in places where you need to use God in New Ways.


++Cal then said to the church..(along these lines)-- Don't just come to church and sit there in your seats. Don' t just come and listen to this message just to enjoy gaining some knowledge. Don't just come get the message and not act upon it.--*Dare to follow the nudges that God places in your heart*


Some people may not like Northwoods cuz it is so big and they think that they are all about having too many people. "Lord fill his church & send the overflow to me."-Cal
Northwoods challenges the community...They are tired of people just filling space...
What a great message!

I have so many things on my mind...so many things I want to say...But they won't make it on here...

Tonight we went to a friends for the Fireworks...It was alot of fun. And Great food...and well I Love food. That's for sure! lol

This thing that we do on Wednesday nights... I don't know--I think we need to do something different...This last week was so good because we did do something different. When I pictured doing these tables I was thinking maybe like every other week or something.. I mean we can change it...Maybe this week tables...and next week another video...maybe a Nooma video...But I don't know how I feel about those somethimes...But in Washington it would prolly go well. We will see I guess. I will keep praying about it. I hate expectations. I hate that all of these people that come expect so much sometimes... If they want something different....TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT! I don't really care if we don't do tables. It isn't like not doing tables is going to hurt my feelings. lol. I really don't care... I just brought an Idea and thought we could try it a few times. I am open to whatever. I do know that the Holy Spirit shows up every week...and that's what we have to continue to ask for.

Relying on God's strength in everything...all of the time is so hard. Sometimes I don't even think about 'oh maybe I can't do this.' Well right now I can tell you that I know I can't do it...That I have to rely on the greatest strength of all to do anything. But it is so much harder to do than say it. Cuz well I know. haha.

I don't know what is wrong with me... I don't think that I am as fun...or funny as what I used to be...Well with Lori things seem different cuz well she is just fun....But Other than that..where is AJay. I can't even explain it...But whatever....lol
"How do I Love fully if I hold back being As is?"

I ask for Change...and I don't get change I get the opportunity to Change...and that is so much greater...

This is really hard





Clean slate here

"I'm sorry.

I do love you the way you are. yeah, i care about what you're doing, but don't take that to mean that I don't love you through any of that. TALK TO ME ABOUT IT. I knew you were mad when you left the car, and this is a conversation we should probs have in person.

But I'm sorry because if you don't know that I love you, then I'm showing you some convoluted, effed up, self-centered love, and that isn't love at all. I'm going to have to work on that.

I love you."

--You have helped me learn what Love is--

Remedy-David Crowder Band

Here we are
Here we are
The broken and used
Mistreated, abused
Here we are

Here You are
Here You are
The beautiful one
Who came like a Son
Here You are

So we lift up our voices
We open our hands
To cling to the love
That we can’t comprehend

Oh, lift up your voices
And lift up your heads
To sing of the love
That has freed us from sin

He is the one
Who has saved us
He is the one
Who embraced us
He is the one who has come
And is coming again
He’s the remedy

Here we are
Here we are
Bandaged and bruised
Awaiting a cure
Here we are

Here You are
Here You are
Our beautiful King
Bringing relief
Here You are with us

So we lift up our voices
And open our hands
Let go of the things
That have kept us from Him

He is the one
Who has saved us
He is the one
Who forgave us
He is the one who has come
And is coming again
He’s the remedy

Oh, I can’t comprehend
I can’t take it all in
Never understand
Such perfect love come
For the broken and beat
For the wounded and weak
Oh, come fall at His feet
He’s the remedy
He’s the remedy

So sing, sing

You are the one
Who has saved us
You are the one
Who forgave us
You are the one who has come
And is coming again
To make it alright
Oh, to make it alright
You’re the remedy
Oh, in us
You’re the remedy

Let us be the remedy
Let us bring the remedy


----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
remedy
Noun
pl -edies
1. a drug or treatment for curing pain or disease
2. a way of solving a problem
Verb
[-edies, -edying, -edied]
to put right or improve [Latin remedium a cure]
remediable adj
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

This song we sang tonight at Sacred Space....And while it was playing I was just thinking about what a remedy is and how we rely on Remedies... and David Crowder Band has it right-Our remedy is Jesus Christ. In this song we beg for it to be alright...we beg Christ to make it alright...and that is the prayer....
**Lord let us be the remedy to this world. Jesus with Skin on. Bringing Jesus to people. Bringing a remedy to God's children.
Listen to this song. It's so great.
------
"I'm a drifter out on a dead end road trying to find my way back home to get to you." Be that Remedy.....
I need that Remedy. We need that Remedy. We try to be our own Remedy...well I do at least. and I know this. It's hard. Too hard.
**You are teaching me daily...shoot you are teaching me by the minute. Learning to listen to you...and learning to be honest with you...and others around me...thank you so much for that...Thank you for that Remedy.

Chewing on it...

I really chew on things when people say things to me...or when I read things...or when I am experiencing things. I didn't really do much of it this past school year...but since I have returned back home that is all I do...everything.
So tonight at Campaigners I am having the girls watch this video...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YiNBmNl88Pk&feature=related

And well you can watch it if ya want..and if you have already seen it, I encourage you to watch it again.
Everything in that video you can chew on. One line at a time...one line a day. I Love it. I really want to challenge the girls tonight to chew on this... I want them to know that they can ask questions...that they can question God. People don't understand that sometime. I question him the same as I question my friends. Does God not deserve to be questioned. Yeah I don't always get my answers....but my friends don't give me answers either....

"This is my Father's World!"

I am really learning what Love is. I am experiencing it. Studying these Love languages has really helped me. Time has to be a Love language that everyone needs. But it is one that others do not show other people... I feel like a person cannot be Loved unless they are shown Time. Whether that is I write you a letter, Send you a Text, an email, a post, a phone call, coffee date, or just hanging out....That is Love. All I want to do is spend time....Spend time Loving you...however that is...I am trying to figure it out...

I'm reading Mere Christianity right now...and this is a book that you would like. I could tell that as soon as I started reading it. It is very good...and is Full of things. There are so many things I want to talk about with it...but Prolly next time...

This really makes me sad...and is annoying actually... but I'm fine with it...



I might work at Castaway July23-August14...I'm excited!!